Monday, March 08, 2004
it's been some time...
i know it's been about a little over a week since i last came here. but then, who's condemned for leaving their blog empty and un-updated for months at a go, right? at least i didn't abandon this place for good. shame on those who do. or did. SIGH. this is the last week before my March 'hols' start. i say 'hols' because we still got to go back to school. on tuesday, for geography remedial. then from wednesday till friday, i got a geography camp that requires us to sleep overnight in school. me and my wicca fanatic friends plan to create a lil' magick of our own... hehe. can't wait!!
on a more sour note, remember the guy that 'likes' me? well, i'm sensing that he's not really sincere in his intentions. he asks for my number but it feels like i'm the one who always has to take the initiative to SMS him or start a conversation with him on the phone. and some nudging feeling tells me i'm in deeper shit than i think i am. my friend who introduced this guy to me just asked me to the year end graduation night as his date. i mean, he knows that i'm currently keeping in contact with this guy, (who is his close buddy) and he has the cheek to ask me to be his date behind his friend's back? does his friend know about this? it may seem confusing to you, but i feel like i'm in some sort of bet between them. because my friend (who asked me to be his date) said that if no one agreed to go with him to the graduation night, he and his gal pal would go together as dates. wouldn't that mean i'm a lamp post in this? a mere substitute, option? i was SO pissed when i pieced together the whole picture...
GRRR!!!!
and the guy who likes me is claimed to be 'not-friendly-enough' towards the Arts gals (he's taking the Science course). is this his way of redeeming himself and proving to his friends that he CAN get to know an Arts gal? and i just happen to be so naive and gullible looking, huh? well, they played up the wrong bitch. it's no longer about who
WANTS to get with who; it's about who
CAN get with who. i'm just waiting to gather enough proof, then blast the hell out of my friend. in the mean time, i'm not acknowledging him. and the guy who likes me, i'm not going to start the SMSes or conversations. to hell with him too. and i trusted him. for Pete's sake. this just goes to prove one thing: Guys will
never be able to be trusted, liked, Loved. in my books at least.
even if it's not a game or bet or even to prove a point, they sure know how to torture a girl who's just broken up less than a month ago. i'm trying my very hardest here to pick up the pieces, and be strong for myself. and there they are, backstabbing each other as friends, being malicious by sneaking me a date, and stating that they want to know me, and when they get the chance, they treat me like dirt and leave me hanging. is this a bad year for socialising with guys for me or what? i think it very much is. :-( not that it's a bad thing, but it's extremely disappointing.
well, on a another climatic side, it's my sister's 12th birthday this wednesday. aww... she's growing up so fast. but she celebrated it with a party at the ice-skating rink yesterday. i was like the Big Sister, haha! but i never realised it would be so fun taking care of at least 14 11 year olds simultaneously... hee~. however, it's been some time since i skated, so today in school, i was limping the whole day. :-P now i'm wearing an ankle brace... going to wear sandals tomorrow.
i feel kind of depressed now, since i realise that people are not very nice anymore. boo-hoo. it sounds child-like, maybe childish. but i think it's the most betraying thing to realise only after some time, that the friends that you trusted and actually believed in, are frauds, fakes.
LIARS. that's damn OUCH. and i've felt that so many times, yet it feels like the first time, every time.
