I am the secret that you keep; MISS SCARLET.

Monday, March 14, 2005

okay, i'm ready to face the music. BRING IT. (er... but slowly please?)

well, after much denial and time taken off to finally accept the fact that i'm not particularly bright, i have to tell those who do not already know that i got B E O and A2 for my A-levels. yup. that bad. B is for literature (of course), E for geography and O for (no prizes for guessing) Economics. well, my mom was surprised i got an A2 for GP though. considering i always bloody refuse to read the newspaper, other than the Life! section.

i have attempted to apply for NUS and NTU. NUS... of course Faculty of Arts & Social Sciences (FASS) and NTU's School of Communication & Information. i think i'm going to let NUS decide if they want to take me in, but for NTU, i'm writing in a letter of appeal. i don't care. i have to try. even if it means sucking up to them (something i hate people for doing). oh nevermind. one thing i've learnt since graduation is NEVER SAY NEVER. you might be the next scholar, next beggar, next whore. whatever it is, never say "that'll never happen to me" or "i would never do that". trust me.

in the mean time, i'm taking things easily, but as always, being the retard that i am, i have my occasional bouts of temperaments, mood swings and plain bitchiness. i've taken an extreme love to stargazing (anyone willing to kiss under the stars with me? ^_^) haha, i'm kidding about the kissing part, at least. and i've gotten to know new characters along the way, some nice, some intriguing, the rest.. a total waste of time.

and by the way, i think my habit of staying up late is getting worse. just last night, i stayed up till about 3.45 am just chatting online. and to think i still have to get up at 9 am. because if i don't, my mom will start screaming at me, and tell me i'm really "impossible". i was FUCKING sleepy the whole day... and i can't really nap because, (again) my mom will say i'm too lazy and i that i bum around too much. but thank God, i have my secret method of cat-napping that always saves me. just give me 10-15 minutes to shut my eyes, and then wake me up. it's not a total refreshment, but at least i won't be so cranky and i'm far more alert. for me, it works wonders.

back to getting back in tune with myself and my other retarded half, i think it was a good idea to go out these few days though. went birthday shopping with my sister yesterday at Orchard Road. and i walked past Jon Jonsson of Manhunt as i was walking from Far East Plaza, in the direction towards Hyatt Hotel. and he was walking in the opposite direction. *GRINZ* i was so STOKED (in his words, hehe) to see him, that i couldn't even approach him and after we passed by, i screamed at my sister and grabbed her arm. then i just went berserk and hyperventilated. hahahahahaha. what a loser i am. (hope he reads my comment on his blog though... *crosses fingers, toes and hair*). then today i was on my way to JJC to "apply" to get my testimonial. i dropped by Bukit Batok Central to photostat my documents and go Watson's a while. then as i was heading off to the bus stop, i bumped into who else? but the ex who i presumably am supposed to no longer have any contact with. the one who screamed over the phone to me saying that he will never call me again (for those who remember, it's in my previous entries). and he was all smiley, except for the bitch who was with him. nah, she wasn't his girlfriend - this girl was a malay, and his girl's a chinese. she couldn't even say "hi" to me properly when he introduced her to me. i had to tell her my name, and she just mumbled "uh... ya" and gave me that fucked up minah look. oh well, it was nice to see him, and he even had a hint of sympathy in his eyes when i told him i didn't do well in my A-levels. ^_^

before this, i already sent him a message via Friendster explaning what i did, and why. then he chatted with me briefly on MSN Messenger saying "forget about it... it's a long time ago." and that's when we started afresh.

hope he calls soon.