I am the secret that you keep; MISS SCARLET.

The signal is subtle
We pass just close enough to touch
No questions, no answers
We know by now to say enough
With only simple words
With only subtle turns
The things we feel alone for one another

There is a secret that we keep
I won't sleep if you won't sleep
Because tonight may be the last chance we'll be given
We are compelled to do what we must do
We are compelled to do what we have been forbidden

So I won't sleep if you won't sleep tonight

Thursday, September 27, 2007

a feeling of sadness, curiousity and nostalgia

we've all once had a friend who used to be our world - our joy, pain and sorrows. even our hopes for the future.

but somewhere along growing up, the differences in environment, the new friends we make for ourselves and the preferences we grow to like, change our view of this world. and of the friendship we had with this person.

i don't wish to divulge too much, as much as my heart's heavy from plenty of nostalgia. but a part of me is seriously curious about what had happend to the both of us. it's a pity, a real shame.

ocassionally, i would receive news of this person from various sources (i.e. people or print) and a small stabbing feeling digs where it hurts most. you may ask, "then why don't you make the 1st move and ask this person out, or catch up with them?"

thing is, i have. and many a times, they've turned me down with reasons/excuses/ignorance. when i tell my other friends of this plight, they merely wave it off and say i don't deserve to hang onto the past, especially if the past has obviously moved on without me.

i guess they're right. but countless amounts of time and years of close companionship have now turned to dust, grime, rust and worst... only memories.

to this person, i can only say:

i hope you remember that i've always been here. and i guess, in some way, i always will be. i know we've had our fall outs, and our make-ups, but there's never a part of me that has regretted a day that we'd spent as friends. if that is all it is to you - memories - then i guess i'll have to be content. because as you have moved on, so have i.

so can i.