I am the secret that you keep; MISS SCARLET.

The signal is subtle
We pass just close enough to touch
No questions, no answers
We know by now to say enough
With only simple words
With only subtle turns
The things we feel alone for one another

There is a secret that we keep
I won't sleep if you won't sleep
Because tonight may be the last chance we'll be given
We are compelled to do what we must do
We are compelled to do what we have been forbidden

So I won't sleep if you won't sleep tonight

Friday, April 24, 2009

bittersweetness that stings

ever had someone in your life who captured the curious side of you, and then you slowly took on a different perspective of that person because every moment that you spent with them was enthralling?

they kept you amused, excited like a little child discovering unchartered territories of yourself you never knew existed. then you made the horrible mistake of letting your friendship blossom into something more complicated and messy.

your head was up in the clouds too high, and it was too late to bring you down, to where you should have stayed, all along. just when you had a hunch that the feelings were mutual, you cracked, and exposed your vulnerability... only for them to look insanely at you, and flee as fast as they could.

they left your world empty. and broken.

from then on, the relationship you had with them has never really been pleasant, and very much like how the heart and every other organ within you plummets and rises up again, on a roller coaster ride.

you know they're unreliable and treat you as a passing fancy, but somehow you can't get them out of your system because they entrapped you so strongly and suddenly in the first instance.

sooner or later, you start to realise, they take you for granted. and treat you 'disposably'. when you want to make them your priority, you are their mere option; a sheer past time.

eventually, you have no choice but to rid their very existence from your life because the constant heartache - from the very first time they rejected you - is not something worth waiting to see if they will heal.

the initial steps, the first few weeks will be nostalgic and somewhat piercing. that's where i am. but i hope, in time, this proves to be the right thing to do. it's something i should've done four years ago.

but i was naive, gullible, stupid and what else could i have done when you just disappeared, after ripping me apart?