The signal is subtle
We pass just close enough to touch
No questions, no answers
We know by now to say enough
With only simple words
With only subtle turns
The things we feel alone for one another
There is a secret that we keep
I won't sleep if you won't sleep
Because tonight may be the last chance we'll be given
We are compelled to do what we must do
We are compelled to do what we have been forbidden
So I won't sleep if you won't sleep tonight
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
more than a year on
i would have no idea if anyone is still following this blog, considering it's been collecting dust for what seems like eons. but tonight, tonight, i just cannot keep my thoughts to myself.
everything that has happened thus far has accumulated to this point where i am literally sitting here, or rather, i can literally sit here (if i want) and bawl my eyes out.
just when i thought my beliefs were already shattered and hope was nothing more than a figment of my imagination, a revelation has befallen me.
my own flesh and blood just denied me faith and reassurance.
it may seem insignificant and ridiculous to many, but after everything that has happened in the past 3-4 years, it means a whole other part of me might as well vanish.
i am seriously beginning to doubt my existence, even more so than before. not just that, but also questioning my purpose. and this isn't linked to any spiritual absence, in case any of you might bring that up.
it's just (what should be) common sense.
somehow every start to the new year, i face a whole new onslaught of blame, guilt and worthlessness. and this isn't self-pity talking. it's things people actually say to my face, although not directly (you know, because people are so gutsy nowadays).
i honestly need out. like right now.
p.s. hmm, it feels sooooo good to type out all this pent-up confusion now, i forgot why i never did write for so long.
PUT YOUR LOVELY NAME HERE
Wani
23/02/1986 (Pisces)
(Psychology & Communications) Monash University
Chatting, chilling, poetry, movies, making love, making out.
Tigger & Princess
In love with love; cynical with a hint of tease. ;) LOVE THE WORLD AND SMILE AT THE STRANGER.